


Hetero-Bullshit

by Warlock_Nerd



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Funny, Gen, Humor, Implied Sexual Content, Implied bottom Magnus Bane, M/M, Sexual Humor, Top Alec Lightwood, this is really shit but funny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-05
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2019-01-29 15:12:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12633699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warlock_Nerd/pseuds/Warlock_Nerd
Summary: Alec has had enough of Jace's Hetero-Bullshit so he rants about it to the only person he can. His beautiful warlock.





	Hetero-Bullshit

Alec was angry. He was so enraged he left work early so he could see the one thing that can help calm him, his wonderful warlock, Magnus Bane.   
He ran to their loft, opened the door and slammed it shut with so much strength the echo vibrated the whole room. Magnus came towards the noise in worry and when he saw his angered boyfriend his concern only grew. 

"Alexander? Are you okay?" He takes a step closer. 

"NO I AM NOT OKAY!" The shadowhunter shouts. 

"What's wrong, darling?" His ringed covered hand strokes Alec's cheek. 

"I AM SO DONE WITH JACE AND HIS HETERO-BULLSHIT!" 

"Hetero-" Magnus tries to continue the phrase but ends up chuckling. 

"MAGNUS! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW ANNOYING IT IS." Alec rolls his eyes and mimics Jace, "Oh, I love Clary." , "Oh, I love vagina - especially Clary's" and "I love how her breasts wobble." IT'S SO GROSS! I AM GAY AS HELL AND I DO NOT WANNA KNOW ABOUT BOOBIES OR ANYTHING ALONG THAT SPECTRUM. OH AND," He carries on his rant with Magnus trying so hard not to laugh, "AND, WHENEVER I TALK ABOUT HOW ALL I WANNA DO IS SEE YOU OR BE WITH YOU, I GET TOLD THAT I AM ANNOYING! ME? I LOVE YOU AND I JUST WANNA SEE YOU BUT IF I GO AROUND SAYING HOW I LOVE TO FUCK YOU ALL NIGHT LONG SUDDENLY I AM THE ONE GIVING TOO MUCH INFORMATION BUT THEN JACE WALKS UP IN MY OFFICE GIVING ME GRAPHIC DETAILS ABOUT CLARY'S FATTY CHEST BALLS! I AM SICK OF IT!" 

Alec pants as his rant is finally over. Magnus bursts out laughing and wraps his arms around Alec's neck pulling him closer. Their lips collide in a passionate kiss. Alec's hands travel down to squeeze the Asians perfectly firm ass. Magnus gasps against his boyfriends mouth making Alec's tounge slide into his mouth creating the perfect French kiss. 

"Alexander." He breathes. 

They pull apart but only to share breath within each others grasp. Magnus rolls his hips teasingly causing the shadowhunter to groan. 

"My poor darling, You've had to deal with Hetero-bullshit all day so.... How about you deal with something Homo-amazing with me and fuck me against the wall?" Magnus giggles. 

"Yes, yes, I would love that."

**Author's Note:**

> I know it is stupid but I found it funny sooooo.............. Leave a comment :D


End file.
